The Legend of Five Reasons, Finally!

Across from the Robot Restaurant in Shinjuku, Tokyo, there is a bar called Ohana (which seems to translate as ‘flower’). This bar holds great wisdom, such as the five reasons to drink sake.

finally for reasons

  1. First of all, for the national holiday.
  2. Morevoer, it fills with the nectar.
  3. Finally, for reasons.
  4. Next, to heal the dryness of the place.
  5. After that, to refuse the future.

This is the best example of “Engrish” I’ve seen. Given that this is a high tourist zone and a sake bar, I’m not sure it is unintentional. It could have been a very clever, deliberate form of meta-Engrish.

The Game of Five Reasons

So, the rules are, adapt the five reasons to another activity. The 1st, 2nd, 4th, and 5th must be adapted from the sake reasons. The 3rd reason must remain the same, for “finally, for reasons” is eternal.

Five reasons to read fantasy:

  1. It relaxes between the national holiday.
  2. Morevoer, it fills with the imagination.
  3. Finally, for reasons.
  4. Next, to heal the dullness of the place.
  5. After that, to refuse the present.

FIVE REASONS TO write FANTASY:

  1. It relaxes between the national holiday.
  2. Morevoer, it spills from the imagination.
  3. Finally, for reasons.
  4. Next, to accompany bourbon.
  5. After that, to edit with coffee.

Five reasons to roast thanksgiving turkey upside down:

  1. First of all, it is the national holiday.
  2. Morevoer, it fills with the yumminess.
  3. Finally, for reasons.
  4. Next, to prevent the dryness of the breast.
  5. And really, no one needs turducken.

Five reasons to run a marathon

  1. First of all, to say it is done.
  2. Moreover, it burns the fat.
  3. Finally, for reasons.
  4. Next, to remove the writer’s block.
  5. After that, guiltless beer and frites.

Until next time, what are your five reasons for your favorite activities?
~Kyle

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